When Good Television Goes Bad; The Comeback of Dexter

If anyone knows me, they know I am obsessed with television. It isn’t something that I am particularly proud of, but my attention span lends itself beautifully to a good 30 minutes of drama, comedy, or science fiction. But, like anyone else who watches television, I know that there will be a season when my favorite shows start sucking ass. When the writers just start making up new characters, new plot points for the hell of it. No matter what happens next in the series, it won’t make sense, it won’t be original, it probably won’t be funny. We will all still be watching. That’s not the point. We will watch until the show gets cancelled for its downward spiral. But we sure as hell won’t enjoy it. Our favorite characters might end up having sex (finally), but is that enough of a compromise? The whole show for one, expected relationship? In fact, wasn’t it those ups and downs between those people that we relished the most?

A good example of an amazing show gone to shit is Dexter. If anyone has been following the great cinematography and what used to be a great plot from the beginning, they will know the utter betrayal and hurt I felt at watching all season after seasons 4. I literally just stopped giving a flying fuck about anybody. The characters became stupid; and even though I hated Rita from the beginning and loved watching her die, her death took the spotlight off her own character flaws and illuminated everyone else’s. Watching Dexter became watching “Everyone’s going to either be killed or fucked by Dexter.” And honestly, that’s boring.

There is a point to this tirade, and that is this: shows can be turned around, people. If anyone watched the season premiere of Dexter today, I think they will agree that not only does the plot make more sense than the plots of the last couple of seasons (especially last season), but it is kind of refreshing to not have to watch Dexter try and have a love-relationship anymore. It was getting too stupid. Sure, anyone and their mother can get a date, but Dexter? He doesn’t give a shit about that stuff, so why even pretend. I like the fact that now he is being hunted, not by a serial killer (does it seem to anyone else that Miami is primarily made up of serial killers now?), but by a licensed professional who would actually do the exact shit this new character is doing. And I love it. I didn’t expect Dexter to get good again, I really didn’t. I had even told myself, just don’t watch the next season (but see above).

Let’s just pray this last season ends on a high note, and probably not with a happy ending.

Bucket List for Fools

I used to have a bucket list in its own journal with hundreds, if not thousands, of things on it. Most of these accomplishments were centered around becoming published, adopting lots of animals, making money, and traveling. There were a few wishes here and there which were unconventional, like learning more than four languages or seeing a giraffe in the wild. And there is what I would like to call the “fool’s list” which I decided to put in my post today. I’m not quite sure what was going through my mind at the time I added these to my list, but if my previous adventures are any indication, idiocy..idiocy was what was going through my mind.

1. Do a favor for the mob– I hate to say it, but this one still makes sense to me. If I scratch your back, you’ll scratch mine, right? What could go wrong? Also, I’m Italian, so I would feel guilty if this wasn’t one of my life’s goals.

2. Punch a mascot -Whether my good ol’ college mascot of the Demon Deacon (wtf kind of mascot..) or an actual famous mascot, they always seem as if they deserve a punch. Or kick to the groin. I just want to hurt one.

3. Fast for a week -This one isn’t so crazy, but for someone who likes food as much as I do, it seems a little ridiculous. I definitely want to try this sometime, though. People say you reach a new spiritual level and you feel clean afterwards. I wonder if that’s just something skinny people say.

4. Walk over hot coals -Trained professionals I’ve seen on television can do this. Why can’t I?

5. See Lady Gaga in concert -I guess I really am a masochist.

6. Smoke peyote in a traditional Native American ritual – I put this one on here because it’s awesome, and everyone should know about it in case there are any rituals coming up they want to invite me to.

7. Get a tattoo on my face -I’ve been thinking a pink elephant lately, or maybe a tiny little bee to commemorate my nickname. I probably won’t ever do this, but I do want another tattoo at some point.

8. Write an erotic novel -It’s good to delve into your own sexuality every once in awhile. Just be forewarned, if I ever write an erotic novel, you won’t know it was me. Maybe.

9. Build an apocalypse shelter -I might not live to see the apocalypse. Then again, I could. And I think that’s something you’d want to be prepared for.

10. Become famous, earn millions, guest star on cartoon comedies, and drink expensive champagne every night – Come on, don’t tell me you didn’t have this on your own bucket list.

I would love to hear your own ridiculous bucket list additions. Comment here or send me an email and I will post them on a separate edition.